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Bollywood Shopping here

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AskmeBazaar Undertakes Process Return Request

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Baap of all Apps-AskMe

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Karma or The Result?

When I was twelve years old, I asked my mother “Mumma! What’s the point of studying? I know addition then why am I told to add kg and m in separate chapters? It’s the same addition!” and my mother replied “Maths will help you when you will buy things, English will help you understand the mathematics questions, Hindi is our mother tongue…” and she went on!! At the end I was told “beta karma karo, falkichinta mat karo”.

But I am old now, in the sense it’s 12 to 18; SIX YEARS, and today I realise, that policy have changed to: “Think about the result and then jump on karma.” Let me make it clearer.

Today when a student who opts for non-medical stream is asked what you want to do, he will say “I will become a Computer Science Engineer.” Ask him the same question after 2 years and this time the reply will be “CS industry is facing recession. No Engineering. I will do something else.” That student won’t give a thought to ‘why I took non-med. Then?’ because he is worried about the recession instead of what he is interested in.

Sometimes commerce or a science student wants to become a writer or a singer or a dancer. Parents directly tell him “Writer? He has no future. No publisher will give you space. Your brother is a doctor. Look at him.” Let him try. What if he succeeds? They will proudly say “My son is a WRITER.”

The last one! Sometimes when you help a poor or a disabled, the question that people will put up is “what will you get by helping them? C’mon stop wasting money in travelling and going there. You will tire yourself.” Firstly we are asked to come out of our nests and explore the world and when we are looking towards the real world and getting out of our nests we are told “YOU WILL TIRE YOURSELF”!! Travelling is the part of exploring. Helping a poor or disabled will help the society grow, poor and disabled are part of it and it’s our duty to deal with them in the best possible way.

#CONCLUSION: It is the result that we see today and decide the karma. I want to become an engineer means no recession can change that thought but things are in the other way.
A writer is told that he has no future. People will think about the result of “no publisher will give him a space” instead of letting him do what he want to do. And the same goes for the helping thing.
Recession first engineer next, publishing first writer then, get first help later—-> RESULT FIRST KARMA NEXT.

English Vinglish- What’s so Cool about it?

“Hey, I am calling from Delhi and wish to place an order with you ….. ”

“Hey can I please get an extra tissue?”

“Hello can you please tell me the price of this dress after discount?”

Doesn’t it sound familiar to you? Don’t you use such sentences in your daily life, too often? Even when it is not required, we actually use this language in our lives. My problem is not with the language or its use. My thoughts wander to make me question why do we use it? Why do we use it so often? Don’t you agree that you feel a little more stylish and confident when you are actually talking to someone in English? No matter you are just at a store or called a customer care or placing an order for home delivery, you use not your mother tongue but English. Why?

I remember an incident when I met a German woman. She was having some difficulty to find her way and when I noticed that I went to her and helped her out. In lieu of my help she said a proper Namaste with her hands folded. That touched me a lot. I put it up on my Facebook too. But the other day a friend of mine pointed out, “what was so moving about that?”. “Do you think if you go to Germany or Italy or any other place in Europe and you say some word of their language they will also feel “moved”, so much that they put it up on their Facebook account? Why are we all so colonized?”

I had no answer. I really do not have a colonized mentality when it comes to considering my language inferior and English superior. But somewhere like all of us, I too am with a colonized mentally. And my friend made me realize that. I do not aim to generalize anything here. But I am sure somewhere we are all colonized. I am sure somewhere we all feel that we should talk in English, we should not use Hindi at certain places or it will be so uncool and unsophisticated. When we suddenly come across elderly people we start using Hindi as we generally assume they will not understand English. But that is not so. I feel that the elderly people, those of my grandparent’s generation I mean, are much more confident of their mother tongue and capable enough to not feel ashamed of using it no matter where they go. Not many of us are proud and comfortable using Hindi everywhere. I am myself a student of English literature. I sometimes quiz myself, “if I am so much in love with literature why didn’t I instead of English study Hindi? Do I have any rights to claim my patriotism yet?”

I agree English has become the language of opportunity. English is the language that has become a must to get good jobs. But why not we just make sure that we don’t get so engrossed with this language of our past colonizers so much that we undermine our own language? Why cannot we freely use Hindi, by freely I mean without feeling uncomfortable, uncool and unsophisticated, in our day to day life, like talking to the Pizza delivery boy or the store manager or our beautician etc. Why?

Criminals are made not born?

A criminal is a person who has committed a crime or has been legally convicted of a crime.

In today’s society there are many sociological issues that affect who we are and what goes on in our world today. One burning issue would be criminals. A big question asked consistently is are criminals born or made?

To me this question falls under the category of stereotyping. When born, there are many factors that influence the way we view and observe the world.

There are some factors which I feel make a normal person a criminal:

Family Issues-

If the parents are unable to care for the child, an ignored child ,Abusive parents (physically and mentally),Poor parental love, Children of alcoholics and drug users ,These are major areas that can affect the brain of a young child. In some cases like abusive parents, the child tends to imitate what he/she has gone through in the early childhood; he/she would be a mirror reflection of the abuses he/she had gone through. That is why it is advised not to even quarrel in front of the child.

Circumstantial Factors

Sometimes a person due to some circumstances loses his normal state of mind. At that moment, he may do something which he may not do in a normal state of mind.

During this period, as the person is driven by feelings and not by his senses, he may commit a crime and may be considered as a criminal in the eyes of law and society.

Peer Pressure-

Sometimes a person due to the influence of the peer pressure may perform some action which may be not be right.

The problem of peer pressure is a major issue which the young generation is facing.The youngsters today feel the need and desire to showoff and are willing to go to any limits for the sake of proving themselves.

It seems that sometimes they lose their mind while following their heart. Their decisions are driven by feelings and not by proper thinking.

Economic Factors-

Suppose a person who studies very hard and still is not able to get a job (unemployment) or a person who works very hard but is still not able to fulfill even the basic needs of his/her family, then obviously he may retort to shortcuts and may become a criminal while following the “shortcut to success” which ultimately will become a “shortcut to hell” for him/her.

External Factors-

The environment that children grow up in also plays a key role as well.What I mean by this is if a child is exposed to seeing drug dealers on every corner it is a matter of time before they get confronted by one themselves.Either they will become apart of the drug game and other cartels they will began to start selling it themselves or they will turn into a drug addict.

Both, in my opinion, are worse situations. Once they get hooked on drugs and cannot afford to pay, they start stealing and becoming thieves.

Every child when born is an innocent angel, a god gift to the parents. It depends on the upbringing of the child on how the character and the personality of the child is formed.

My personal opinion on this would be that criminals are not born, but are rather made due to certain conditions in their lives.

It has been seen that many a times a person coming from a good background may become a criminal whereas a person with a criminal background may become a good person who works for the welfare of society.

THE RED SHOES

Foot wear have always been the favorite part of a girl’s closet. She can spend thousands of rupees on shoes but still never be completely satisfied. Black, blue, white, nude, pink have been on the top favorites of most of the girls since years. Though the color red has been a little controversial since a long time but from a past few years, this has been the color in vogue! Red footwear can be worn with all type of attires. From a casual day look to the formal party look, with red shoes in your closet you are all set to go! At this present moment, red shoes are a part and parcel of every girl’s closet. Red shoes can punch up the blandest of outfits and make them bold and bright.

If you are getting ready for a party and you are all set with your sexy dress and the accessories all you need to make a lasting impression among others is to grab a pair of red high heels. For a casual day look what you need to do with your attire is to term them up with a pair of red flats and you are all set to go to make a lasting impression. Red foot wears has created wonders in boosting up the confidence and giving you a whole new and more desirable look.

Many girls are still a little bit skeptical about red shoes. And for all those girls who consider red a very bright color can try out by wearing a deeper and darker shade of red like maroon or burgundy. Come on girls, experimentation is really essential to keep your image maintained. Even if your dress has neutral shades like black, white or nude, teaming them up with red shoes can completely change the whole look. While wearing black heels would give them a much dull look, red heels can instantly brighten you up! Red shoes would also look amazing with skinny jeans and a skin fit top.

Though the color red is very much “in” this season but an overdo of red can change your look into a fashion disaster. For example teaming red shoes with neutral shades like black, white, beige, gray or brown would give you a decent look but wearing them with your red, yellow or green dress would completely kill your look. Red shoes are the sexiest footwear your closet can posses, if you have them in your closet, well you don’t need anything else to give you a more glamorous look!

The color red has really evolved in past years. It the sexiest and coolest pair of shoes any girl can own. It can be your friend when you need an instant confidence booster…it surely can provide you with that! Bellies, stilettos, casual heels or any footwear in red can give you the much needed glamorous look instantly! Choose them wisely and term them up accordingly, and you are all set to possess the ultimate diva look throughout the day. So come on ladies…think something different from the regular neutral shades of shoes and be ready to be admired by all!

An Open Letter to All

Dear all,

I am indeed very glad to witness your protests for rape cases , your speeches , debates and discussions on women empowerment and your promises to safeguard women in the country . I am grateful to you but I would have never preferred you to take the pain of coming to the streets and protesting or  holding large scale campaigns . Why not start by fixing up your own funny little grey cells !!

If you think rape , molestation and sexual harassment are the only problems that women face then I would like to turn your attention to many other  things that make us feel suffocated and doomed wherever we go .

Since my childhood I have always been told by you to learn household work along with my studies while my brother never bothered to see if anything else existed apart from his school , friends and cricket . When you are nurtured  a sense of patriarchy in him since childhood how did you expect him to respect his wife later in his life . He would do anything he liked and  you would ask me to behave like a “girl” .

” Don’t play with boys don’t hang out with your male friends , don’t speak in loud voice , don’t answer back !! ”

Why ?  Why shouldn’t I speak ?

Are you afraid that I will eventually blurt out all those stupid things I m subjected to  ?

Why do I have to prove myself when I want to pursue a course of my choice when my brother is provided with all the facilities he never asked for ?

Why do you limit your daughter to all those “girly” things when she wants to go out into the world and live freely?

When it comes to marriage why am I asked  “Arey , aapki shaadi nhi Hui ab tak ” whereas he is asked ” Aapne shaadi nhi Kari ab tak ” .

Why does marriage become a compulsion for me and a choice for him ?  Why is it always the boy has the right to reject the girl whereas a girl doing so would be considered inappropriate ? I don’t even understand that why does a thing like “character” or the much hyped “charitra” exists for a girl but not for boys . A boy with many girls will be a Casanova but the girl doing so is considered a slut .

At my workplace also why am the target of all your lewd jokes ? I have to bear your awful gaze and stupid comments every time . Getting a promotion would also put my so called “character” into question .

I m expected to be a good employee and an excellent housewife as well . I am alone supposed to be looking after everything in house in spite of being as fatigued as my spouse . But no …..you think it is only the men who have office issues whereas doing household work is my duty . Why don’t you see that you are also provided with the same number of pair of limbs as me ? Why can’t you work ?

Worst of all , it is considered decent to bear all the repression inflicted on me and I m expected to be mute to all the nonsense happening around me .

Do you even realise how suffocating it is ?

Sometimes I feel like fleeing but I know that wherever I go I will eventually fall into the clutches of this monster of patriarchy .

Why am I so disillusioned ?

Ladies please don’t think you are on the side of the angels here . Don’t forget you are one’s teaching your daughter to be “decent” and letting your sons do whatever they like . Laughing off their mistakes whereas punishing your daughters for the same . You are first one’s to question a woman’s character . You bear all the torture your husband inflicts on you and expect other women to do the same . You let patriarchy thrive and that’s why it comes to haunt you everywhere .

Protests, debates and discussions are not what is important . I want to see the practical implications of all that you speak of . A change in the government or some law is not what is important . Make a change in your perspective. Be the change yourself . If that happens these mass protests and campaigns won’t even be required and it then that a woman in our country will be respected in true sense .

Yours ,
A woman

Politics at its pristine best!

Never had we ever in our lives heard of ministers working day and night in this 2.4-7 degree winter season, that too, for the betterment of the masses .A “politician”, the word which had become malign due to the actions of our previous holders of this name, now seems to have regained its lost ground, the pristineness with which it was brought up in its young days, just to infuse this sense of philanthropic cum socialist behavior with which AAP looks at it and approaches it. Overtly speaking, visiting night shelters of Delhi at 10.30 pm and visiting all of those in areas like Mongolpuri, ChandniChowk, Rajouri Garden, etc till 4am was never a politician’s cup of tea but Manish Sisodiya and Rakhi Birla made it a living dream for the entire public to be proud of their choice to have selected such “Politicians”, the Sewaks in the true spirit.

Their persistent effort is also visible from the appointment of 200 volunteers who would assess different schools on the basis of parameters like teacher per student
ratio,absenteeism,infrastructure,class size,etc. ,the report of which shall be submitted 2 weeks from now.Even, the Jal Board has started regulations on tanker services of water supplied to all the localities in the city and they have been given authorized to take legal action against those found guilty or not conducting their jobs properly or misbehaving with the Aam Aadmi.

My view to this entire changing scenario is that “Aam Aadmi sota hua sher hai.kabhi uski naak mein ungli mat karna.kyunki jab who jagta hai ,toh woh bade badon ki chhuti kar deta hai”.(The common man of this country is a sleeping lion.don’t try to pour your finger into his nose.you are bound to suffer!).Rest is up to you to decide: are you the sleeping beauty of this generation or the woken up thunderous storm of the cause?

IPC 377

Section 377 of Indian Penal Code, which criminalizes sexual intercourse in Indian made a buzz again. This section was declared unconstitutional and decriminalized sex between consenting lesbians and gays by Delhi High Court on 24th July 2009. That judgement was overruled by the Supreme Court of India. And it advocated that the amendment of constitution is a matter of parliament and not of Judiciary.  Whoever voluntarily has carnal intercourse against the order of nature with any man or women or animal shall be sue under law with life imprisonment or for a term of ten years and also be liable to fine. This verdict has met support of religious leaders but made human right and gay right activists angry.

Religious leaders and people against homo sexuality were unanimously agreed t the verdict of Supreme Court. They asserted that the concept of homo sexuality is against Indian culture, science and nature. And one of them argued that he can cure this tendency with yoga.  People cannot consider themselves to be exclusive of society. They also put forward questions of reproduction and future generation. These same sex couples’ successors will grow up with a skewed vision of life, family and ethics.

The civil liberty unions and gay sex activists made counter arguments also.  To them the verdict is barbaric, medieval and homophobic religious attitude.  When we talk about LGBT issues, we should not confined to the sexual matters, but we  have to keep an open eye  on larger implications of basic, civil, political and socio-economic rights. By this verdict the constitution itself brands its citizen as criminals. This may cause a social exclusion of LGBT
community from mainstream. These people are not demanding for anything additional to the rights that the rests are enjoying.

Though there is notions about health and HIV and consider it as a conflict between the cosmos of material success and that of values, we cannot simply deny the fact that the gays and lesbians exist around us and no legislation would be able to change their sexual orientation weather it is inborn trait or matter of choice.

The Anniversary

December 16, 2012
Does this date reminds you of something? I’m sure it does. There’s not a single soul in this country who can afford to forget that brutal and fateful night. It was this very date, a year before when a young girl was mauled by six beasts and was left to die on the streets of Delhi.
This incident shook the whole nation deeply. The outburst of the citizens was sudden and huge and triggered something totally unprecedented. Thousands of people came out on the streets to protest, which went on for days and paralysed the capital. All this jolted the judicial system and forced a rethink. And the fact that things have changed a lot in the last year cannot be denied. The law has been amended to change the definition of rape and the provision for punishment has been made extremely stringent. A tough new law now holds the cops directly accountable, with refusal to lodge a case inviting a two-year jail sentence. This in turn has led to the reporting and registration of more and more cases. All these are very welcome steps but I ask is that all? Is that all we need to do to ensure the safety of women in the largest democracy of the world?

I don’t think so. Making a law in itself is not enough; it is its implementation that matters. The rape cases have seen a jump of 125% and Molestation cases are up by 417%. Now tell me, has anything changed? There’s still a lot that needs to be done. Women are still being ogled at, they are still seen as objects in this male dominated society, they are still being raped and still being molested. More fast-track courts are needed to deal swiftly with sex crimes; the police force needs to become more vigilant and empathetic towards complaints from women victims. A lot needs to be done for the care and rehabilitation of rape victims to help them combat the social stigma that they have to face in most of the cases. The trauma of a rape victim doesn’t end with the crime, they need counselling to move on in life. These are some of the steps which still need to be put into force to ensure a positive change. And most of all it is the predominant patriarchal mindset of the society that needs to be changed.
On this first anniversary of the heinous crime that took place that December night, let us all pledge to do our bit to bring about a change, a revolution and ensure that no other Nirbhaya or Damini will have to go through something like this, ever again.

Modus Operandi

A verdict of Ahmedabad court and a statement by BJP’s prime ministerial candidate Narendra Modi followed by it made a buzz in recent political scenario. Mr. Modi published a blog post invites vocal uproars. It was after 11 years became vocal prior to the victims. These eleven years in sot a short time, and 2002 massacre is not dissolved into history. for the last eleven years it was alive and it got new dimensions when BJP announced Modi as their Prime Ministerial Candidate for 2014 elections. Recently Mr Modi has been acquitted by Ahmedabad court from the charges of a massacre held in Gujarat during 2002.

Prima facie Modi was suspected in this case. But the investigating agencies were ‘failed’ to produce evidences against him in court. It might be legally correct. But there is a larger implication of Social correctness. Many former bureaucrats and high level official who worked under Modi like Sanjiv Bhatt and Sharma are still vocal bout Modi’s involvement in the riot. According to Sanjiv Bhatt, ‘the SIT has done as much harm to this country’s ethos as those lying politicians and those blood-thirsty mobs which ran riot in those dark days. What misfortune that we had to expect anything half-way good to emerge out of their investigations. It’s a grave, dastardly fraud perpetuated upon us by the same inhuman system that failed to deliver justice during the ’84 riots, the 92-93 riots and the terrible Bhopal Gas tragedy!’

A mere confession like statement is not at all a closure to the issue until the justice delivered. Though I am not a linguistic, the tongue that Modi used in his statement is not appropriate for a confession which suppose to address the survivors and nation. Literately the statement did not serve anything to justice. But it reflects an eye towards Delhi. By this strategy BJP can pull a minority in Muslim community into chaos and can make them not to vote against him. But it will not happen in a larger level.

There can be no closure to 2002 without Justice and Reparation; and there can be no Justice and Reparation without Truth and Genuine Remorse.

Rise and fall

As a society it is important to revisit the tragic events of history so that we are able to see things in the present times with objectivity and not let history repeat itself

History tells us that the subjective perceptions of large groups of humans have been massively exploited by political opportunists. By the time the truth emerges, it already becomes a dark chapter in the history of mankind. Winston Churchill rightly said, “A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.”

As a society it is important to revisit the tragic events of history so that we are able to see things in the present times with objectivity and not let history repeat itself.

Adolf Hitler was chancellor of Germany from 1933 to 1945 and dictator of Nazi Germany from 1934 to 1945. He founded Nazism and started World War II and the Holocaust. Hitler joined the German Workers’ Party, precursor of the Nazi Party, in 1919, and became leader of NSDAP in 1921. Hitler was responsible for the death of an estimated 21 million civilians and prisoners of war. In addition, 29 million soldiers were killed in the European theatre by systematically putting fear in the minds of the majority population against the Jews. His brand of German nationalism saw unprecedented support.

Hitler’s foreign and domestic policies had the goal of seizing living space for the Germanic people. He motivated invasion of Poland in September 1939, resulting in the outbreak of World War II. Under Hitler’s rule, in 1941 German forces and their European allies occupied most of Europe and North Africa. In 1945 the Allied armies invaded Germany. Hitler’s supremacist and racially motivated policies resulted in the systematic murder of 11 million people of his own country, including an estimated six million Jews.

In the final days of the war, 0n April 30, 1945, Hitler committed suicide to avoid capture by the Red Army. Hitler’s oratory earned him DAP’s membership in September 1920. DAP soon became NSDAP. By 1921, Hitler gained notoriety for his effective speaking ability to large audiences. He gave rowdy, polemic speeches. Historians have noted the hypnotic effect of his rhetoric on large audiences. Kessel writes, “Germans speak with mystification of Hitler’s hypnotic appeal. Hitler is said to have mesmerised the nation, captured them in a trance from which they could not break loose.”

Alfons Heck, a former member of Hitler Youth, described: “We erupted into a frenzy of nationalistic pride that bordered on hysteria. For minutes on end, we shouted at the top of our lungs, with tears streaming down our faces: Sieg Heil, Sieg Heil, Sieg Heil! From that moment on, I belonged to Adolf Hitler body and soul.”

The effect of great depression of 1929 in Germany was catastrophic. Hitler exploited this by targeting his political messages specifically at people who had been affected by its effect, such as farmers, war veterans, and the middle class.

On February 27, 1933, the Reichstag building was set on fire. He blamed the communist. At Hitler’s urging, Hindenburg suspended basic rights and allowed detention without trial. Activities of the German Communist Party were suppressed, and some 4,000 communist party members were arrested. Historians found that the Hitler’s party itself was responsible for starting the fire.

In 1934, Hitler became Germany’s head of state with the title ‘leader and chancellor of the Reich’. Within months, the other parties were disbanded. A number of Hitler’s political enemies, even from his own party were executed. While the international community and some Germans were shocked by the murders, many in Germany saw Hitler as restoring order.

Hitler oversaw one of the largest infrastructure improvement campaigns in German history, leading to the construction of dams, autobahns, railroads, and other civil works. He sponsored architecture on an immense scale. In 1936 Hitler opened the summer Olympic games in Berlin. Hitler was Time magazine’s Man of the Year for 1938. It may be significant to state here that Hitler was on the cover of Time for as many as seven times: in 1931, 1933, 1936, 1938, 1941 and 1945. The May 7, 1945 issue came out after the discovery of Hitler’s body on May 2 with the iconic cross on his face. A war memorial at Hitler’s birth place there is a stone with inscription: “For peace, freedom and democracy, never again fascism, millions of dead remind us.”

It is fascinating to know Hitler’s personal choices. Hitler wore designer clothes. He loved to be filmed and photographed. Hitler followed a vegetarian diet. He despised alcohol and was a non-smoker. He promoted aggressive anti-tobacco campaigns throughout Germany. To the public, Hitler promoted his own image as that of a celibate man without a domestic life, dedicated entirely to his political mission and the nation through documentaries.

Unknown Dalits

Karukkakkuruchi, a small village near to Coimbatore in Tamil Nadu is now known for a news of commiseration that made in this New Year night. A group of Dalit villagers were brutally beaten up by the so called ‘upper class’ men at the very chilled night of New Year. These dalits were warned not to conduct new year celebrations. Men with arms were attacked them allegedly the dalits violated their ‘warning’.

It not novel that Dalits are considering as second citizens in India, the largest democratic country in the world. It is literarily pathetic that they are facing apartheid in these days while we are celebrating Madiba. In December 2012, European Union has passed a resolution to arrest  casteism, asserted that it is diablotic the status of dalits in India.  They exemplified some incidents such as a consecutive dalit rapes in Hariyana and firing of dalit habitats in Tamilnadu etc. Former chief Justice of India Altamas Kabeer has opinioned that the media and civil society is cruelly indifferent to the atrocities against dalit groups. They are very vocal against rapes and murder of upper class people but used to keep mum towards issues concerning Dalit community. Channels and News rooms alloted more time and space for ‘Nirbhaya’, they skillfully ignored the story of  a ten year old Dalit girl, who has been brutally gang raped and burned to death in the very same day the Nirbhaya episode taken place. We have no answer for an Australian journalist, who asked why there is no dalits in decision making positions of any media house. There was no editorial remembering Dr. Ambedkar in his birth Anniversaries.  Government of India routinely did its duty by publishing ad in  memory of him in newspapers. All else was nothing. It is high to press an unlike button to the anti-dalit pro brahmanical attitude of institutions despite of private or public.

Once Dalits were victims of feudal Zamindari system, now they are that of feudocracy, extreme upper class hinduism and state terrorism. Dalits were inhumanly more treated by extreme hindu groups, that their ideology itself inculcate the notions of ‘chathurvarnya’. An incident happened in Dharmapuri district of Tamil Nadu, which caused alienation of 2000 dalits was a perfect example for this. During this incident the thugs were intentionally destroyed legal documents such as educational certificates, ration cards, possession documents even laptops etc, that will eventually alienate dalits from social arena. It is something socially incorrect that the government machineries also affected by Bharahmanical  notions. Government, especially its executive machineries wickedly coined a term as ‘Dalit terrorism’ and brought all collective uprisings of the community under the shadow of something disastrous. There is no special court for any Dalit issues. What draws a recent verdict by Patna court that acquitted 23 upper class men who brutally butchered 21 dalits?

Dalits are inevitable vote bank for each mainstream political movements and their attitude towards the community was like a patron to look after. They themselves made a political movement under Kanshiram as Bahujan Samajwadi Party, which politically recognised and accented to thrown. But they were remained as socially alienated. Though this conditions  remain still unchanged, dalits themselves assert that “do not try to be our fathers”. In this juncture we can hope there will be a ‘democratic’ India that treats equally its citizens. But still many ideals remains as utopia.

Law too weak?

Whether it is Delhi, UP, Gurgaon or Noida, the scenario regarding the safety of women is almost same. Every girl whether working or house maker or school going children or college student are prone to sexual assault, sometimes even in day time. Not much has changed after the brutal rape case of 16th December, rapes are still happening and people are still turning more animal. “Animals also take mercy and do not do such cruel things” says a girl who doesn’t want to be named, when asked about how she feels when she hears about such cases.

A few days back there was news about 4years old girl being raped, long time back about 7 months pregnant woman being raped and also 82years old woman being raped etc. now such cases makes difficult to understand whether the man is normal or not.

As per the facts, the 6 fast tracks courts that were set up to tackle sexual assault case after the 16th December case, has been able to solve only 380 of 1,670 cases and surprisingly these courts solved lesser cases than the normal courts that take up such cases.

With so slow working of the institution of justice, it is hard to hope for justice to happen at right time. A lot of cases are still pending where the victim has lost her life, waiting for years for justice. As said “justice late, justice denied”, how many actually believe that the 9 months taken to make a decision on the brutal act of rape of 16thDecember was right, when even the evidence were so strong?

Living in era where even organization who is supposed to keep peace and harmony and check over crime is involved in crime, on whom should people trust? This is a big question that is rising every day in everyone’s mind and making everyone to look at every other person like a criminal.

The law has no effect on the criminals or wrong-doers, because of the level of corruption that has developed in country, people think and believe getting away with anything is really easy. Would life-sentence or Death-sentence give justice to victims and deterrence to crime? A question by public, that needs answer.

You are on your own

While travelling through metro today, I saw this lady who was a north-eastern, standing with huge bag on her back and loads of money in her pocket. She was in her night dress, in metro with her sister or a friend, I don’t know. I managed to get a seat and was busy in untangling my ear phones which always messes up. As soon as, I untangled and got busy in listen to songs, my sight goes on this lady’s wrist. And I was horrified. What I looked at,wasn’t what I see rarely, but still I was like “what the heck!”

Now you all must be wondering “aisabhikyadekha”, so this lady, about whom I am talking since last 10 lines, had huge cuts of knife, starting from her elbow and ending on her wrist. No single place was vacant on her wrist. It was all cuts and bruises. The first thought that came to my mind was, what could be the reason behind this torcher she made herself go through? A lot of us go through a lot in life. And for many of us, relationships out of our family are sort of escapism from what we face around us. This typerelationship is the most fragile one; everything and anything can lead to the biggest mistakes of one’s life. No I am not talking of virginity here; virginity is no more called a MISTAKE. I am talking about the suicidal tendencies that are growing in numbers, day to day.

Sometimes not even a relationship, but family matters and all stuff like that, makes one do so. Cutting wrist, eating some medicine, drinking poison etc. have turned like a game, for people nowadays. I know and understand life is not easy to live. But, if you are so weak that anyone and everyone can have access to take away your life, then life becomes hell. We all, including me, need to learn every single day that, we, at any point of life are living for ourselves and are on our own. We cannot be dependent on anyone, and cannot expect that someone would bring peace in our life, because to have peace in life, one has to be in peace within them.

Nothing can raise you in life if you are yourself demoralized and nothing can bring you down if you are respecting your inner-self more than any damn thing around. This doesn’t mean that you start misbehaving with your parents or with anyone, as that would again disturb your peace of mind. But this surely means that we need to grow up, stop punishing ourselves for things we aren’t even responsible for, tit for tat might work a lot of times but not every time. Value yourself; don’t expect that someone else would do it for you. Remember, you came to this alone, you will leave alone. You were never ever born to satisfy or live on other’s terms but was born to live on your own terms.

CHANGE

I’m happy; I just can’t keep others happy!
well, many say I have changed, I say “change is good, change is worth the effort.”
you don’t just change in a day, you see, analyse, get hurt, get emotional, get betrayed and then one day you wake up to be someone totally different. Well, they just simply see the changes not the reasons behind you changing yourself.

There are happy days, and then there are sad days and then just DAYS. You keep yourself going somehow but then there is a disappointment that clings to your mind and body. This disappointment is out of nowhere, because the day you woke up and changed, your mind changed but then you felt stranded and alone. Suddenly you wish everything gets back to normal but it is too late! This is life, life is disappointing and expectations? Well, they hurt a lot more.
So just accept the change and focus on the pros rather than the cons. Because at the end of the day, those people because of whom you changed will themselves figure it out, because it’s not just your mess but there’s too.
Don’t take off on the guilt ride, everyone gets a chance to make a difference, everybody has to adapt to the change and then it changes completely, and this change is good, it keeps you going.

So yes I was somebody else yesterday, today I am someone new. No I do not change every day. I just keep myself going and then I adapt.
In this process, we lose many people, some are close and some are not! They are just stepping stones. You meet people, few stay, and the rest; well they walk away.
You can’t keep acting and pretending, some day you have to let go the people and live with the memory.

and now that I am a grown up, sensible enough to pen down my emotions, I find it easy for me to see and look through the changes and then simply accept them as a part and parcel of life!
But then don’t we a get a benefit of emotions? I mean cant we simply overlook and accept each others as we are, completely flawed and harmless! Just lost somewhere between the monopoly of life. Well, I guess not!
So when life is throwing these changes I me, I changed myself for my better own good!
As they “fittest survive”.
 
 

HEART OR VIRGINITY?

A lot of people believe that everything in India walks the wrong way (like the cars on road). When asked about few things like sex, relationship, love an Indian would probably 99.9% say that love comes first then comes relationship then marriage, that too if they feel connected, and for a lot of people, over the time, connection is on basis of their compatibility on bed. For girls/women, losing their virginity is a big THING. India is still living in an Era, where women are still afraid of losing virginity because they are “THE IZZAT OF FAMILY” and also because of rumors that it can be known if a girl is virgin or not. The question that rises in my mind, while thinking about this is how does it matter? Can you know if a guy is virgin or not, if he does not confess himself? What is wrong in it, if you lose your virginity with someone you love, No matter what happens later in life?

Why is it that in our society virginity is HUGEEEEEE THING, whereas a heart is broken every now and then? On contrary, heart should have been the most important thing in this entire world and one should be afraid to break heart rather than breaking one’s virginity.

A survey says in US or any other foreign country, dating comes first which doesn’t involve words like I LOVE YOU, but they just stick to words “I like you” and “I am attracted to you”, whereas in India even before one actually knows about someone enough to LIKE him or her, one confesses “Yaarmujepyarhogayahaitujhse!”. Then the next step in relationship of foreign countries is sex, which is a big social stigma in India before marriage. Now the thought behind taking this step so fast is, they believe that indulging physically early would not distract them later when they are in love, as in they would like to know heart of other person rather thinking of having sex all the time, which happens in India where love happens first and people think and talk of sex more rather than sharing their life and emotions. Obviously this cannot be generalized, but more often this is what has been noticed.

After sex come’s commitment, that guys in India do not usually like to opt for and later comes marriage, a step that is taken after completely knowing about a person, unlike in India where two strangers are tied together or Lovers leave right before such moments because it wasn’t what they were planning.

Breakups and patch-ups are part of life, why to let it have a big effect on our life? Why we feel our life is waste if we fail? Try to read between the lines; try to understand that relationships mostly fail because of lack of understanding. Not that foreign couples do not part away, they do. Yes I agree that society influence is a lot in India as compared to other countries,  I am not saying that we are wrong and from tomorrow everyone should have sex first then move to next step, but think over it – is heart more important or your virginity.